Since Father’s Day will be arriving soon, I honor my father with this post.
My father was a man who wore many hats. He was a wonderful provider, great husband to my mother and of course a exceptional dad to all his children. Not only can I say that I was lucky to have him but I was more fortunate to be his daughter.
My dad passed away in 2008. He left us with sorrows in our hearts and questions of why. I still remember that day. It’s still clear in my mind. My relationship with my dad was one that couldn’t be replaced. During the last week of him living, he called me, came over to visit and made more of an effort to spend time with me and his grandchildren. In my mind I didn’t think much of it but during those times and being alone with him were some of the best memories of my dad.
I remember sitting outside in the front of my home with my dad as he was reading the newspaper. During this time frame, I was three months pregnant. Kidding with my father, I said dad what do you think I’m having? Another boy or will I finally get my girl. His response was ” How the hell am I suppose to know”. We giggled because my dad always found a way to say something crazy to change the subject. My dad had girls and I was the last one. So, yes I was his baby. I had three boys so we automatically thought it might be a strong possibility that this baby that I was carrying was gonna be another. Needless to say, my father says to me, “Well what do you think it is”. I said to him, it would be nice if I had a daughter. We just smiled and carried on.
It was two days later and my twin sons were just entering middle school. I got a call from one of my sisters that my father didn’t show up for work. This was abnormal because my father was a worker. He wasn’t one for taking time off from work and always arrived on time. So we had concerns of his health and well being. I told my sister that I would swing by his home to see what’s going on and asked if she would join me. When we pulled up to his residence and seen his van, my heart dropped. As I was walking with my sister and youngest son at the time up to the door, I asked her to watch my son and let me go in by myself. I didn’t know what to expect and I wanted to make sure that my son wouldn’t see his “grampie” in his unknown condition.
When I turned the key and stepped in, I took a deep breath and called out for my dad. No answer. I called him again and again. I seen his work clothes laid out with his glasses and keys.
As I peeked in the room, I seen my dad sleeping. I called him again. No answer. I walked over to him and touched his hand. My father passed away in his sleep.
I ran out to tell my sister and I was hysterical. I couldn’t control myself even being pregnant. You see, my father was the glue that held my family together. He loved his family unconditional and always put us first.
Two months had passed after his wake. I couldn’t control the anger that I had as we were left with no goodbyes or I love you’s. I sat and began to understand why he was taken away from a family that loved him so dearly. I was sad on many occasions because my father would never get to know my unborn child until this happened.
I had a dream one night. My father and my niece who also passed away came to me and told me that I was having a baby girl. My niece was the one that was speaking to me and my father was pacing back -n- forth with a sad look on his face. I was ignoring my niece and focusing more on my father. I just wanted to hear his voice and tell me that he was ok.
The next morning I had an ultrasound appointment. I remembered that my father came to me in that dream and what my niece said. So during the ultrasound, I was asked if I wanted to know the sex of the baby. I instant said, can I guess. Sure enough the baby was a girl. I never shredded more tears of happiest like that day. It was such a wonderful feeling that took over me.
One of things that my father taught me was to give unconditional love and that family comes first. No matter what road life takes you down, be blessed of the love that surrounds you.
Never have regrets and never take those tender moments for granted. This coming September will be my father’s 7 year anniversary of his death. As much as I wish he was still here with me, I know he continues to watch over his family, grandchildren, great grandchildren and what a wonderful feeling that is for us.
So on this Father’s Day, I honor my dad. Thank you for being so caring, thoughtful, generous and loving.
I am one lucky woman to have a father like you! You will always be my hero!
Love you and Miss you Dad! Happy Father’s Day!